Fear “Fact”or

From whatever I have studied for GRE I have understood that Phobias have many types right from the fear of height, Fear of depth, Fear of Confined spaces to Fear of crowded streets. I don’t fear any of them (seriously J ) ………….but I have developed a new phobia these days. ……Phobia of school growing students……..why because whenever I see them I see closed down schools and that Swine flue virus coming towards me, singing the song “ I am gonna get ya get ya get ya…….one way or another “. Man this gives me jitters!!!

Jokes apart to tell you the truth it’s not that happy merrily singing H1N1 virus’s fault. The main blame goes to the airport authorities who are handling the situation very lethargically and remaining goes to the stupendously idiotic Indian media channels for making a a big hype of it. If we see it correctly these channel people should educate people on the flue instead of giving out silly bits and pieces on the how this man got the swine flue and survived, What are mans feeling after having swine flue,

“ Puna mein 39 log swine flue se pareshan…..kya hai asali khabar ……jaannane ke liye dekhiye” like that and all. I know you run a 24 hrs of news channel and you don’t have better to news than Boring well kids, Amitabh bacchanas Cold and Yamlok ki sair like a shitty stories but that doesn’t mean instead of comforting people with real knowledge you scare them with your half baked knowledge. Is this today Indian media man now I have phobia of them too a real one.

As I see swine flue is not a dangerous type of disease, it can be cured well within 8 days; normal cold also takes that many days. Yes I know I am not a doctor and I can’t predict its effects and all stuff but we have faced deadly outbreaks in the past deadlier than this like plague and all. Didn’t we have chickenpox and stuff when we were little? At least I had once. I believe if there are no new diseases then, virologists and doctors will be out of work It is challenging for them its like someone has designed a new language and they are learning the syntax and semantics. I guess we hadn’t had such a fear of diseases when we were young because the media people weren’t dumb as much as they are now.

So much fear. Fear resulting from dearth of knowledge ……I read article in Pune Mirror (now this is called real journalism newspaper) a student who got infected with swine flue few days back is now cured totally but nobody is ready to play with him he is banished by his own friends!!! What the hell…….. Authorities are also so stupid one school arranged a meet for the parents teachers and students to inform that some students got swine flue and they are keeping school closed till the matter is resolved exposing more people to virus. You are running a school guys you are not supposed to be that dumb.

All n all I guess whatever happens happens for a reason. Due to this swine flue Non veg eaters have one item less in their plate. I guess god is trying to maintain the ecological balance or god of animals is doing some favor to the pigs. Ahhhh ….Who are we to judge his ways. He works in mischievous ways ……freaky….Yes but mischievous.

First there was Salmonella, then Mad Cow after that Bird Flue and now Swine Flue. Still god hasn’t blessed fish with that I guess. Telling you fish guys don’t take load at all I f god doesn’t favor you Indian Media Channel will, they most probably invent one, probably a disease named “Something Fishy”. Till they do that swim away guys…..

Life..... that was before..

Prologue
Why are you so late to the interview? Where were you - HR?
Ohhhh this is the first time I have been to MIT so I got lost really sorry – me
Ok, proced to your interview.
My god what a dumb lady, She has my address there in her hands and she still bought this?? I practically live next to MIT!!! Dude I don’t want to go to this company.
Interviewer 1 – tell me the code for circular link list and pointer and blah blah blah.
I actually didn’t know anything and went on explaining. Old saying by a wise friend if u can’t convince them confuse them. Again he also bought it. My god what’s happening
Interviewer 2 – Sell me this stapler. What!!!!!!!!! Is she gone completely insane? This is not my stapler. Its urs already, don’t you get that, If u want to test me just phrase the question right!!
Interviewer 3- So u have any questions.
Me – Yes may I know my score in section 2. ( I was too much curious abt it, I haven’t solved any of this and they had sectional cutoff)
Interviewer 3- You got 75% in that.
My god what is happening is it really my luck, Fate what is going on.
2 days later got the letter; we are pleased to welcome you to Family. Hmmmmm
I am still not sure I want it.

Chapter 1. Training or at least they thought so
Hello welcome all you IT guys have been allocated to mainframes. –Surendra Deshpande or wanna be Hitler
Ahhhh so now I am stuck…
Next three months gone in listening to the trainers who doesn’t know anything besides the book and making gr8 friends, playing carom, TT and celebrating birthday parties.
Actually I didn’t get the point of keeping the training if nobody knows anything abt anything right from the trainers!!!

Chapter 2 – Bench: an IT companies awesome hell
Bench period man, why should we go to the company – me to Mahesh
After 15 days of rest at home got the call you have been allocated to Chrysler project
For each day I went to manager Vijay to ask abt the work he will assign me.
Vijay – ya come back tomorrow I will definitely give you work.
After 15 days of playing cat and mouse got a mail from vijay. Team meeting at 2!!!!!
Awesome first team meeting I am going to start working now. What a feeling
Vijay – Hi guys there is sad news, Chrysler project has went bonkers and you all are on bench now.
What hey vijay what about me.
Vijay – Don’t worry u haven’t worked anywhere yet you will get a work.
Hmmmmmm, so basically I am a football.
3 months passed no one is responding. Alone in the cubicle watched other people leave. Collected huge amount of data, Researched on every topic from technical stuff to movies.
I am bored!!!!
Bas…its Decided now I don’t want to do anything with this company. I am going for MS.

Chapter 3 – Project or work again finally

Congratulations you will be working in CF AIM now, rohini will tell you abt the business and get you familiarize with the environment. – Parijat.
I had MS fever so I didn’t paid that much attension. Leaving each day on 6 O clock bus was routine. Got some good advice from rohini abt it. But really doesn’t matter now I have decided I don’t want it.
Started getting good in Mainframes again after 3 months.
Mainframe is really boring and too much easy. Lets do something more.
Had the insane idea with the project buddy Dipak lets do Banking certifications. We did it that too we were first one to do and yes lots of them too J
I realized I am becoming addicted to certificates and their glossy shine.
Started chatting with some people on the floor and got some coolest friends.

Chapter 4 – DF days
You are assigned to DF project and you will have more responsibility.- Kiran
Ahhhhh sounds a great chance what difficult can it be after all it is mainframe work.
Worked smart and still left the office on 6 o clock bus.
One fine day (for him I guess) Kiran – Hey I guess u don’t have work u leave by 6 o clock bus everyday. Start handling other module too
What man!!!! I leave early that doesn’t mean I don’t have work.
Another fine day Upendra my PL – Hey Sourabh we require u to work on JAVA as well are u interested.
Well hell ya ……..
Whats the point really I am going to give resignation in few days joining the university again. Still went to work on Webams.
Awesome days.
Learned share trading, Played pranks, organized events and all, Man this is my company life ending and I am on high roll.

Chapter 5 – Farewell
Last day at company. Wrote last day’s mail to people. Met with some people whom I am gonna miss the most. Some are not available today. Shocking!
Clearance procedure done with some hitches and glitches after all its my company J . The team people organized a birthday party. I was in that too.
Some faces I don’t want to see at all some I wish to see everyday.
I didn’t expected this much gr8 farewell. What a feeling.
Now I can remove my mask of my professionalism and live a life………

Epilogue
After 22 months of rigorous efforts for not wanting to be a part of this company I am really feeling something. Like I have lost something. Yes I have lost my job…..But apart from that I lost many things. Those birthday celebrations, Share trading sessions, going on a crusade to the food court each day to find out same menu as yesterday, Hanging out with friends, Sweets, namkin and chocolates at my desk ………. Found someone, lost someone……..
But what I miss the most are people who made my life awesome and those too who irritated me at least I understood what not to do from them.
Thus thanking you Lakshmi, Neha, Deepak, Sagar, Umesh, Rohini, Shweta, shyamal, priya and many more who made my life go from shabby monochromatic to wonderful rainbow. This book is over but who knows what is going to be written in the sequel. Kay Sera Sera……

एक नंबर !!!!

वॉट अ मॅच........11.00 वाजले, मॅच संपली तरी मी काही TV सोडून उठायचे नाव घेत नव्हतो. रॉजर फेडेरेर् ह्या महान माणसाने आज 16 Grandslams खिताब जिंकून नवा विक्रम प्रस्थापित केला.फेडेरेर् ची मॅच असल्यामुळे मी सनडे नाइट ला सुद्धा TV पुढे बसलो होतो. अँडी रॉडिक आणि रॉजर फेडेरेर् दोघेही एकमेकांना पुरून उरतील असे खेळाडू. रॉडिक ची तुफान सर्विस तर डोके लावून नाजूकपणे कौशल्याने शॉट मारणारा फेडेरेर्.

पहिला सेट रॉडिक जिंकला वाटू लागले आता फेडेरेर् हारला. दुसर्या सेट फेडेरेर् ने अशी काही झुंज ड्यालला सुरवात केली की आता फेडेरेर् चे पारडे जड झाले. परत रॉडिक ने झुंज देण्यास सुरवात केली. मॅच आता tiebreaker मधे गेली होती. ना फेडेरेर् ना रॉडिक कोणीच हार मानायला तयार नाही.......अरे काय हे आमच्या सहन शक्तिचा अंत का पाहत आहात असे विचार मनात आला एकदा. पीट सँप्रस, रोड लेवेर, बियोर्न बोर्ग एवढे सारे महान खेळाडू सुद्धा हाताची नखे कुरतदत होते. सचिन ला तर जाम टेन्षन आले आहे असे स्पष्ट दिसत होते. एकावर एक एकमेकांना टोले देताच होते दोघेजण अखेर 16-14 असा पॉइण्ट घेतल्यावर फेडेरेर् जेव्हा जिंकला तेव्हा फेडेरेर् च्या चेहर्यावर झालेल्या आनंदापेक्षा रॉडिक च्या चेहर्यावरच्या निराशेने फार वाईट वाटले मला. काय झुंज दिली माणसाने!!!

खरच खेळ हा अत्यंत क्रूर असतो ह्यात शेवटी कोणाला कोणाला तरी विजयी व्हावेच लागते आणि दुसर्याने कितीही चांगली झुंज दिली असली तरी काळाच्या ओघात तो हरवला जातो आणि लक्षात राहतो तो फक्त चॅंपियन "जो जीता वही सिकंदर बाकी सारे बंदर" म्हणतात ना ते हेच.

ही मॅच बरेच काही शिकवून गेली हरून सुद्धा रडत रडत जोक मारणारा अँडी रॉडिक खिलाडू वृत्ती शिकवून गेला आणि कितीही अवघड काम समोर असले तरी असेल त्या सर्वानिशी झुंज द्यायची ह्याचे प्रात्यक्षिक देऊन गेला. सर्वात जास्त शिकवले ते फेडेरेर् ने. मागच्या वर्षी हाच फेडेरेर् इथे हारला होता नदाल कडून आणि वर्ल्ड रॅंक 2 पण झाला होता. ही मॅच जिंकून परत वर्ल्ड नं 1 पण झाला. विजय अमृितरज चे शब्द ऐकण्यासरकहे होते. "He dont want to be no 2 no he wouldnt accept it, He only wants to be no 1" काय ही जिद्द !!! अशी जिद्द सर्वानकडे असती तर आज आपण सगळे कुठे पोहचलो असतो?